So often, single women are busy searching for Mr. Right, and those who are married are often saying they must have “married the wrong person”. I know that even I have pleaded with God that “I must have made a mistake”, to “please free me from this marriage”. “I won’t be able to survive this” “I can’t do this anymore” He probably sat back and chuckled …because HE knows better…and HE knows what exactly I CAN handle!
Don’t get me wrong, I love and adore my husband and would never give up on this marriage, but I’m also not going to sit here and lie and tell you it’s been 13 years of pure bliss. A successful marriage takes determination and a lot of hard work……I mean REALLY hard work!! Throw in a couple of full time jobs, and few kids….and yup, things just get a whole lot more challenging!
Now to make things even more exciting, mix together an OCD control freak mamma such as myself with a very anxious, scattered, ADHD (untreated I must add)husband such as Phil and you have Mr. and Mrs. Westbrook! Who’s laughing now????
So, to the point….I believe that God doesn’t necessarily “ordain” marriages, and we likely aren’t brought together by “fate”. The fact is, we are human…God created us to admire the opposite sex; He created us to long for companionship. And he created marriage. And more often than not…..we get emotionally caught up in the moment and Marry Mr. Wrong! {The funny thing is…those who have heard my story, know that I could hardly stand my husband when we 1st met!}
With THAT said, I truly believe, that while you may feel that you “married Mr. Wrong”, or that your marriage “wasn’t meant to be”, or that it was “based on lies”, he “wasn’t like this in the beginning” That can ALL be mended…God can and will bless a marriage! You just have to be willing to let Him in! Yes…let Him IN your marriage, IN your heart, and IN your way! Cause you know you’re going to keep trying to step back in! It isn’t about praying for God to change your husband, start by asking Him to change YOU!
For myself, I have spent too many years and countless prayers asking the Lord to change my husband, or I would just die!!! I now know that I have to first start with me. I have to be patient and persistent, and not to become discouraged when I don’t see the change in him that I expect when I have made efforts. Persistent, because my motivation for changing ME isn’t JUST to better my marriage relationship, it is to better my Godly relationship! Your husband may NEVER change; I know mine won’t, {unless God completely heals him!} Therefor I will be the clay, allowing God to mold me and shape me into the wife that HE created in me to be! And in return, I have a fulfilling, fun, sometimes chaotic, but very much rewarding marriage! And a husband that adores me for me!
